It is clear from the results and the form letters I receive from my Congressmen, for spending time writing well reasoned arguments, is not worth the effort. I have therefore decided to change my tactics. While I know at best my letters will be tallied into No support or Yes support piles by bored staffers, and at worst ignored completely, I can only hope to amuse myself through the time spent writing such letters. As such I couldn't stop myself when I received a form letter from Senator Robert Casey in response to my many pleas to vote 'No' on this bailout plan in which he rationalized his position. I decided the only tactic that would prevent me from becoming homicidal was to introduce sarcasm. As such my letter follows:

Senator Casey,

Thank you for your words on the bailout, I mean stabilization bill. I do agree with your sentiment, "I'm angry about the climate of deregulation and deference to Wall Street over the last eight years that got us into this mess." If only the congress actually understood what deregulation means, but instead of actually deregulating the economy they have been adding new regulations nearly weekly. Hopefully through this unprecedented power grab and the inevitable resulting economic destruction to follow, in terms of years, people will finally learn that even the first sliver of government involvement in the economy puts us on the road to economic destruction.

Oh, wait, upon re-reading your letter you seem to think that you are actually doing the right thing here and are actually solving problems not just making them extremely worse. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you and I were in on a joke together, oh well, maybe the next Senator will understand individual rights and economics.

Well I can say one good thing about the "stabilization." 9 Trillion[^1] is such an odd number, so boring. But 10 Trillion, well now, that is excellent. A number you can really sink your teeth into. And you almost entirely triggered the change with the passage of one bill. Tremendous. Maybe with all the other entitlement bills that passed this year we'll even hit 11 Trillion that is great, and prime! Nothing is better than prime. If Keynes were alive I am sure he would send you a thank you note and maybe even a box of chocolates. Must stabilize the economy by continuing to spend, heck, throw in some flowers too.

I for one will do my part. I plan to apply for several more mortgages and loans. It'll be a great win for the economy. The builders will get paid, and all the people who sell to the builders will also get paid. There is no discrimination, I can get my loans even if I am considered high risk, so no one can cry "UNFAIR LENDING PRACTICIES." There is no bank failure, they aren't allowed to fail, you said so yourself. And there is no way I can lose my "property." I mean really we can't have banks going around seizing property, that is something that is best left to the federal government.

Thank you for your time.

Anyway, I feel much better now.

[^1]: Referring to the National Budget Deficit

AuthorKevin McAllister